Proposing to your partner is a milestone moment, and one question that might cross your mind is whether to include an engagement ring. While an engagement ring has long been a traditional part of popping the question, what you choose to propose with — just like how you propose — can be as unique as your relationship.
If your partner isn’t into rings, already wears one on every finger, or prefers something a little different, what you choose to present when you pop the question is entirely up to you. And who says you even need to get down on one knee? When the time comes, you’ll probably have a pretty good idea of what will make your soon-to-be fiancé truly happy.
If you’re exploring engagement ring alternatives, you’re in the right place. In this post, we’ll explore why there’s no need to feel tied to the tradition of proposing with a ring and share 30 creative ideas for unique and personal ways to pop the question — because your proposal should reflect your relationship, not anyone else’s expectations.
Why has it become a tradition to propose with an engagement ring?
Engagement rings have been a tradition since ancient Egyptian and Greek times, but it was the Romans who made giving an engagement ring a legal requirement and made it popular. An engagement ring isn’t a legal requirement in the 21st century, but the tradition of giving one while proposing has stood the test of time.
That said, traditions evolve, and not all of them align with everyone’s preferences, style, beliefs, or budget. If that’s the case for you, here’s the good news: there’s no rule saying you must buy an engagement ring for your future fiancé!
How much do engagement rings cost?
In Australia, the average amount spent on an engagement ring is around $5,367. Traditional advice suggests spending one to three months’ salary on a ring, but this is far from a strict rule. These days, most couples focus on personal preferences and staying within their budget, so don’t feel obligated to follow outdated expectations when proposing with an engagement ring.
Read our ultimate wedding budget breakdown for a complete guide to how much every part of your wedding might cost.
What engagement rings will never go out of style?
Planning to propose with an engagement ring and want to pick one that will stand the test of time? Here are some timeless engagement ring styles that have remained popular for decades — and are sure to grace ring fingers for many more to come.
- Solitaire diamond rings – The solitaire diamond ring (any ring with a single diamond) has long been the classic engagement ring. It draws complete focus to the big rock in the centre, with round-cut diamonds being the go-to (but most expensive) choice.
- Diamond halo ring – A twist on the solitaire diamond ring, which still features a large diamond, but is surrounded by a halo of small stones to accentuate its beauty.
- Trilogy ring – A trilogy ring features three stones, which could be three of the same stone (such as three diamonds) or two different stones (such as two diamonds on either side of a central sapphire).
- Emerald cut diamond – Emerald cut diamonds have a striking rectangular shape, which always makes them popular. They’re also not as expensive as round-cut diamonds due to less of the diamond being wasted during cutting.
- White gold and platinum rings – The popularity of yellow gold jewellery comes and goes, but white gold and platinum remain consistently popular.
Can you propose without an engagement ring?
Yes, you can propose without an engagement ring. The most important thing you need to offer in a proposal is your love and commitment to your partner. However, make sure you’re confident that you know what your partner would like to receive when being proposed to. If their dream is to wear a diamond engagement ring, then popping the question without one may come as a bit of a shock.
What’s an alternative to an engagement ring?
An alternative to an engagement ring is any meaningful gesture or item you give to your partner instead of the traditional ring to symbolise your love and commitment. This could be anything from a unique piece of jewelry to a tattoo.
Choosing an alternative is a deeply personal decision. Maybe you and your partner aren’t drawn to conventional traditions, they’re not a fan of wearing rings, or perhaps your wedding budget doesn’t allow for an engagement ring. Whatever the reason, the choice is all about what feels right for the two of you.
Can anything be an engagement ring?
Yes, absolutely anything can work as an alternative to a traditional diamond engagement ring. It could be another ring, a different piece of jewellery like a necklace, or anything your partner might love and appreciate. In season three of The Simpsons, Homer proposed to Marge using an onion ring! This obviously isn’t a long-term solution, but it shows just how creative you can be with your proposal.
30 alternatives to an engagement ring
If you and your partner aren’t interested in the tradition of wearing an engagement ring, there are plenty of alternatives you can choose instead. Below are just 30 suggestions for what you can give your partner when you ask them to marry you.
10 rings that are great alternative engagement rings
- Birthstone ring – A ring that features the birthstone of your partner, or one that features both of your birthstones.
- A handmade ring – A ring made by a craftsperson and sold at a craft fair or online retailer such as Etsy.
- Lab-grown stones – Lab-grown stones are environmentally- and budget-friendly.
- Simple band – A precious metal band, much like a wedding ring, is a fantastic choice.
- Promise ring – A promise ring can be given before an engagement ring, which the two of you might choose together.
- Eternity ring – Traditionally given after a specific relationship milestone, but remember, traditions can definitely be broken.
- Family heirloom – A ring that’s been handed down from a relative could be a wonderful engagement ring alternative.
- A vintage ring – Vintage stores and charity shops can be a treasure trove for unique alternatives.
- Wooden ring – A rustic and eco-friendly choice.
- Engraved band – Super personal and thoughtful.
10 pieces of jewellery that are great alternative engagement rings
Instead of a ring, you could propose with a different piece of jewellery. It could be something personal to you, which you could customise further by choosing relevant birthstones, preferences or engravings.
- Necklace
- Bracelet
- Charm bracelet
- Brooch
- Earrings
- Watch
- Ankle bracelet
- Cufflinks
- Body jewellery
- Locket
10 alternative engagement ring ideas that aren’t jewellery
For a truly one-of-a-kind gesture, why not forgo the jewellery altogether and choose something completely unexpected?
- Tattoos – If you’re into body art, an engagement tattoo combines your lives.
- Handfasting – Usually performed at a wedding ceremony, but can be a symbolic gesture the two of you could do at an engagement.
- Handwritten letter – A handwritten letter can help you communicate just how strongly you feel about your partner, which you can give to them during the proposal.
- Journal – Similar to a letter, a journal is something you write over time and shows how your love has grown. Another idea is a book of promises, which is a book filled with the promises you’re making to your loved one and how you intend to keep them.
- Wedding fund contribution – Instead of an engagement ring (which can be expensive), agree to put that money into the start of your wedding fund. Or, why not donate to your partner’s favourite charity?
- Custom artwork – This could be anything from a watercolour painting to a pencil drawing, either by yourself or an artist you both admire.
- Plant a tree – What better symbol to start your commitment together than by planting a tree the two of you can watch grow for decades to come?
- Keepsake box – Choose a box the two of you can fill with memories.
- Proposal video – A video of your memories that ends with you popping the question.
- Celebrity video – Websites such as Cameo allow you to ask celebrities to record a personalised video message, which makes for a unique and exciting way to involve your partner’s favourite actor or musician in your proposal.
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